dog food

what do you do when a visiting relative quite pointedly tells you in front of some other relatives that you're "26 and have nothing to show for?"

me, i'd drag myself to an obligatory shopping expedition, make some obligatory grunts and monosyllabic responses while letting the comment stew in my head. when i cannot take it any more, i'd make some excuse for not being able to stay for dinner, buy some dumpling mami for takeout on the way home and eat it. then i'd lose some sleep over not verbalizing a solid come-back. so i'd construct a text message telling that relative i resent her opinion while defending my line of work and admonishing her about passing judgment on things she understands little of. just because i'm not in the medical profession like most people in the family or i don't have another usual 9 to 5 job or i don't rake in a lot of money, doesn't mean i'm not doing okay. it's just not my practice to brag about what i do. and what the hell is this thing about cousins younger than me--doing not half as well, mind you-- suddenly fathering children, two in a row, and then everything becomes pink and rosy and good for everybody? it's despicable.

after pouring myself out on a 6-part text message, i'd go into numerous stages of R.E.M. then i'd wake up, remember that by experience, nothing good ever came out of texting angry feelings, decide to scrap the idea altogether and just hum a happy eheads song. and then, i'd do the most adult thing that i could for the moment. i'd make semi-yang chow fried rice enough for everybody in the casa to eat, wash a pile of dishes, clean the kitchen table top, remove cobwebs overhead, sweep, mop the floor, handwash a backpack-full of laundry, bathe and scrub the stinky couches with soap, an overload of zonrox, baking soda and downy and drag them into the sun to dry. then i'd rearrange my old project hard files, fix the dresser and my closet, do some more sweeping, wash the electric fan, scrub mildew off the bathroom walls with good old domex and have a long warm bath.

ahhh...the endorphins you get from dust and grime and sweat and detergent fumes. i really should do this more often.